A message from Dirty Sanchez...
From: DR.ROBERT SANCHEZ <eulottomail@aim.com>
Subject: CONGRATULATIONS!!! YOU HAVE WON EUROPE LOTTERY 2006
I mean, what else could the Dr. stand for in this context?
FROM: INTERNATIONAL PROMOTION/PRIZE AWARD DEPT.
REFERENCE: 67/80/IPD
BATCH: EGGS-541-623-782:
RE: WINNING NOTIFICATION / FINAL NOTICE
Co-sponsored by the Slash/Promotion/Award/Dept., and by the AAA (ALL-CAPS ABUSERS ANONYMOUS).
P.S. “BATCH: EGGS”? WTF??? Somebody seems to be a few slices of ham short of an English breakfast...
Sir/Madam
We are pleased to inform you of the result of the Euro millions Spanish Lottery Winners International E-mail programs held on the 20TH OF DECEMBER 2006 and result where release on the 28TH OF DECEMBER 2006. Your E-mail address attached to ticket number 653-908-321-675 with serial main number 345-790-241-671 drew lucky star numbers 34-32-90-43-32
The last time I heard, it was 90-60-90, you dorks. Or 36-24-36 if you're into imperial units.
which consequently won in the 2ND category, you have therefore been approved for a lump sum pay out of 1.000.000.00 Euro.(One Million Euro)CONGRATULATIONS!!!
What sort of lumps will it be? Coal? Sugar? Cancer?
Due to mix up of some numbers and names, we ask that you keep your winning information confidential until your claims has been processed and your money remitted to you.
Dang. There goes my €1M.
This lottery was promoted and sponsored by Spainsh European Lottery board in order to enhance and promote the use of Internet Explorer Users and Microsoft-wares around the globe.
A bit of a Freudian slip there, eh? Oh, but now I see: you're promoting the use of IE Users, not of IE itself. I heartily endorse that. Internet Explorer Users certainly have their uses. Crocodile food comes to mind.
To file for your claim, please contact our fiducial agent:
DR.ROBERT SANCHEZ
(SANCHEZ SECURITY COMPANY ESPAÑA)
I'll send you a file in a cake. That should help you get out of that security company.
Remember, all winning must be claimed not later than one month,After this date all unclaimed funds will be included in the next stake.
And burned along with the latest batch of heretics. Good to see that the Spanish are keeping up their traditions.
Note: Anybody under the age of 18 is automatically disqualified.
Sincerely yours,
MRS,COMFORT JOSE
OMG, what a name. Any unusually well-developed disqualified 17-year-old boys are encouraged to apply to Mrs Comfort for the consolation prize...
posted by ill-advised at 9:42 PM
4 Comments:
LOL I can't believe you've actually found a Freudian slip in your spam mail. BTW, today I received my first Nigerian scam letter. I'm so proud.
Good for you! I wish you a lot of fun with your ill-gotten millions :) All I got this morning was a piece of spam that looks like an Alaskan weather forecast, entirely in all-caps:
HEAVY SNOW WARNING IN EFFECT FROM 6 PM THIS EVENING TO NOONAST FRIDAY.
Wow, D2O snow. The atom bomb manufacturers will be delighted.
THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE IN JUNEAU HAS ISSUED A HIGH WINDWARNING.
They had beans for supper last night.
PLEASE ADVISE THE APPROPRIATE OFFICIALS OR FIRE CREWS INTHE FIELD OF THIS RED FLAG WARNING.
Yep, the Commies are staging a comeback. Everything we've heard about Russia in the last 15 years was just a big ruse. (Pardon the execrable puns.)
KEEP EYES OPEN FOR FALLEN TREES.
Why be satisfied with a sharp stick in the eye, if you can get the whole tree?
SNOW SHOWERS IN THE ADVISORY AREA WILLPERSIST THROUGH EARLY TOMORROW MORNING
Just pick up a bar of soap and stand outside for a few minutes.
my name is sammy yoz are mental
Iam 8 and i thought new film was great
And you have the nerve to call me mental? :)))
Post a Comment
<< Home